Lonley in the Wilderness

November 19, 2009 at 3:15 pm (Blessings, God, Happyness)

My friend Kristen, over at http://midnightcry.wordpress.com, is once again sharing her journey through a topic that touches my soul, and kicks my mind into high gear.


You can read the introduction here – http://midnightcry.wordpress.com/2009/11/03/loneliness/

And the most recent update here – http://midnightcry.wordpress.com/2009/11/17/loneliness-from-the-beginning/


In the way my mind wanders as I read I sometimes find myself mentally in a completely different galaxy by the end of a text, than the author intended me to be. So if you will allow me, I am going to lament on Loneliness a while longer here today, and share some of the revelations that come along with that. If we would all be so blessed as to hear God speaking to us on this matter I encourage you to share either here or on the Midnightcry blog.



The Wilderness is something that constantly lives in my mind. I ponder the years I have spent living in the wild. How God was amazing enough to allow me to experience that for all the good, the bad and the ugly that could be found there. I believe those were necessary years in my life, as those were the years that took me from dust, added enough moisture to turn me into clay and began to form me into the creation that will leave its memory on this earth.


Sometimes I would take the reins and add a little moisture on my own and be turned into a sticky puddle of mud on the floor, or stand in the sun for too long, only to find that I had turned to dust and blown down the road in the wind. Sometimes I would even jump directly into the fire and start to form that hard outer shell. God has always taken me back out of the fire and lovingly turned me back to dust and added just the right amount of moisture again.


I tell that little story like I have reached the end of the wilderness, but that’s not the case, and that’s where the revelation comes in. I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I will screw up again. Somewhere, Sometime I will do it, and I will do it in a big way. Even as I try to walk with God, I will hose it up somehow. So that means, I am not really out of the wilderness. I bet I am not even as close to the edge, as I imagine myself to be. In reality, when looking at the breath and the width of mans ability to walk with God, I am guessing that all I have done is reduced the leaves in the canopy of my own personal wilderness by about tenth of a percent. 


I feel like I am panting this in a negative light, and maybe that’s a good thing, but that’s not the point I am trying to get to here. What I really want to say is there are times in life where we need to shed those earthly relationships and be truly, physically alone, because those are the times when we finally can come to know ourselves. To know who we really truly are, and to know God in the way that he longs to know us.


Natives call it a Vision Quest. I call it the Wilderness. You can call it whatever you want, but the fact is that’s It’s like a city dweller standing on the outside looking at Sherwood Forest. It’s a darn scary place, until you muster the courage to step across that border and venture into uncharted territory. And there is always the chance you won’t like what you find when you get there, which I think is what holds most people back in the first place. The second time is a little better, but still very hard. Each time after gets a little easer, until it becomes a place of refuge, and eventually a place if intimacy with God.


Now, please don’t misunderstand me, this wilderness isn’t the same as that of the lost years, but more of a place that is separated from earthly desires and distractions. It’s not our permanent dwelling place on earth, but a place of safety, a place of understanding and intimacy.


I encourage you to seek this place out sometime soon.



Well, one way that works for me is taking a fishing pole and tackle box out and sitting on the shore for a few hours, alone. No ipod, no phone, no books, no distractions.

Pastor Steve does it with a tent, some water and a bible.

You have to find your own way, but the idea is stop feeding and let it start to work on its own for a while.


Maybe this will make sense to someone

God Bless


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Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness

May 19, 2009 at 5:19 pm (Abortion, God, Happyness, Liberty, Life)

Let me start out by saying I am neither politician or politically driven, the thought of either one leaves a horrid taste in my mouth.

I heard the old saying today “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness, and started thinking about that.

Now, I have to assume that when the Declaration, while being penned by Thomas Jefferson, every word was carefully weighed and measured. That he wrote, and re-wrote, adjusted and modified each word and sentence for maximum meaning and effect. On top of that it was reviewed and edited thereafter, until the perfect phrasing of the Declaration of the Independence of the United States of America was reached. To that end, I give you the entire sentence that contains, the so often quoted “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness”.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are  endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

Of course I present this to you for a reason. I want to break down these words to try and more deeply understand the authors meaning. These are my personal observations, nothing more.

We hold these truths to be self-evident – Simply stated; Jefferson was saying that it should be obvious that there are things in this world that are True, no matter what. That there are a few things in life that are truly Black and White, and no matter how someone might twist them, you can always fall back on that knowledge.

that all men are created equal – The Color of my skin, my sex, my age – everything that I was given at the time I was given life is mine, and is the basis of who I am, but that does not place me above or below any other human on this planet. The choices I make from that moment on are done by my free will and will determine who I become in life. This was a statement that not even the signers fully understood, but would later lead to a war, which in the end would allow black men and women to walk freely on this land. The same statement would hold true for women’s right to vote. The statements, which to this day, is not fully understood.

that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights – The fact that the writer acknowledges a creator in this statement tells me that he/they understood that what we have, all that we are, was given by a grater being. That Creator, later named as God, endowed each and every one of us specific undeniable rights. Things that man was given the physical ability, but not the right to take away.

that among these are – This just says that they are only part of the Unalienable Rights, there are more, but these are fundamental to the foundation of our Nation.

Life – First on the List is Life, that is particularly important in the fact that it was placed above all other unalienable rights. The right to life is first and foremost on the minds of the founding fathers. Undeniably they recognized the fact that, without the right to life all other rights have no meaning what so ever.

Liberty – Freedom, this is another basic right to every beating heart brought into this world. None should ever be oppressed, or restricted from forming their own belief systems, weather that be based on the teachings of others, or from one’s own self study

and the pursuit of Happiness – I find it interesting that the words “Pursuit of” were added here. We are not guaranteed Happiness, just that we can chase it to our hearts content. Also placement matters here. We are invited, as Americans to chase our dreams, so long as it’s not at the cost of Life or Liberty.

Three things listed, not a big list, but one that appears to be very confusing for many people. Primarily the ones to believe they have the right to be happy no matter the cost to those around them, or those who place their idea of personal happiness above others unalienable right to life of others.

In all things done on a governmental level we need to consider these things first.

Does it affect life? Not the quality of life, but life itself. Does it cause a heart to stop beating? If the answer is yes then it should not be dropped. If the answer is no then we consider the fact of if it restricts our Liberty, and the same, of the answer is no, then we weigh the idea of it, whatever it may be, restricting us from perusing Happiness.

God Bless you today, and every day.

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Do not hide the name of Jesus

April 20, 2009 at 9:22 pm (Bible, Christ and the Bible, Faith, God)

The idea of Jesus is uncomfortable for a lot of people. So often we hear people say “Not my God” or “The Jesus I know wouldn’t do that”. We so often want to change the God of the bible into something softer and kinder then what he actually is.

We all know Jesus the dead man, all though I think we have heard the story so many times that it has lost much of its meaning.  I think we forget how extreme life was for Jesus on the day of his death. I am guessing that if his Skull existed on the earth today it would still carry the scars from the thorns that were driven into his head. The whips used to rip the flesh from his body deep enough to expose bone. The cross, carrying the cross through the streets while guards continued to beat him. After everything he went through that day I would almost think that death would be welcome.

Then there was Jesus the magic man. My wife hates it when I say that, but really to the unbeliever, what else would his miracles look like? I mean really, a little boy’s lunch feeds 5000? Jesus rubs bud in a blind man’s eyes and he can see? Rise Lazarus – Do you know why Jesus had to call Lazarus by name? Because he is so powerful that had he not specified Lazarus all of the dead would have risen (Borrowed from Bill Johnson). I imagine that in the end times it will be like that. Jesus will say Rise, and we will. In today’s world you will hear people say that these are just stories written a long time ago, to try and prove a point. They didn’t really happen. I say this is the faith of a man who is afraid to believe that was not created in his own mind.


Of course we have Jesus the angry man. So many times I hear people talk about God Love, and Gods grace that no matter how you are God will forgive you. Yes Gods love is in failing, and unyielding. We are covered in grace by the blood of Jesus. And yes, if you confess your sins and repent God will forgive you. Nowhere that I have seen on the bible does it day that God or Jesus will never become angry with your actions. As a matter of fact, the whole picture of God speaks otherwise. The bible paints a picture of God as a father, Passionate and Loving, willing to place he first and only blood son on earth to die at the hands of man for the salvation of his adopted children. Tell me he isn’t going to become angry and punish us for not following him. That’s one of ways a father raises his children.

These last three tie together so closely that it’s hard for me to pick apart. Jesus the punisher, Jesus the king, Jesus the warrior – I can go on for days about this, but really it’s not about what I have to say. READ REVELATIONS  

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Is your Bible an Earthly Treasure???

March 25, 2009 at 7:00 am (Bible, Christ and the Bible, Faith, God, Jesus, Life, life lessons, Prayer)

One of the recurring themes in my life is where I store up my treasure.

Matthew 6:20

…store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.

I constantly have to asses my wants to try and determine if they are a fleshly want, or a tool to build up my heavenly treasure. One thing I have never questioned, till this past Saturday morning, was my bible. I like bibles, I have many of them. A couple weeks ago I was telling myself I need a new bible, because I have a hard time reading mine when it’s lying too far away on the table. Now I am very capable of picking up that bible and moving it closer, I could also put on my glasses. My very favorite bible, which is just over a year old, looks almost like it just came out of the box, because if am near a computer, which is most of the time,  I will use biblegateway.com rather than flip though the pages.  So I started looking around with this thought of buying “Another” bible. This last Saturday while in the Excellencies of Christ class, I was looking at the bibles of those at the table around me. The only ones that seemed relevant were those that were worn out and trashed looking, the ones that have shared life with their owners. Yes I have bible envy, but there is a bit more to this story than that.

You see I had a revelation that the bibles we all carry around, the ones that we can physically hold in our hand with the leather bindings, and union paper and are printed with black and red ink, are just another treasure of the flesh, another earthly belonging. Now don’t get me wrong, the bible is indispensible to our faith. I am not trying in any way to minimize that, but here’s the deal. In its printed form the bible is of this earth. It’s when we read the word; speak out what is written there, that it becomes spiritual. When we consume the words and store them up within our minds, and our hearts, and they become an intangible thing do they become a spiritual treasure, a treasure stored up in the heavenly warehouses.

If you are here reading this message you have the keys to unlock this door. Don’t get hung up on what the cover of your bible looks like; get hung up on what it protects.

Its spring time and many people are looking forward to their spring heart challenges. Many employers are sending out the pedometers, and we will start counting our steps. Here’s my challenge to you, after your daily reading of the bible, whatever that may be, 1 page or 1000 – At the end of the day look at your pedometer and for every 1000 steps you have taken read one more page of the bible.

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The bible according to who?

March 23, 2009 at 4:29 pm (Bible, Christ and the Bible, Faith, God, Happyness, Jesus, Life, life lessons)

So, I have been very consumed lately with the idea that some people changed the word of the bible at will.

I had a good friend, and somewhat of a spiritual mentor, tell me (at least this is the way I remember it) that the things book of revelation had already come to pass, so held no weight in Christianity today.    

This raised some red flags for me and I should have questioned him on this further, and truly wish I would have. He no longer speaks to me, which is truly sorrowful to me, because I believe he is leading others into a false relationship with God.

Here is kind of my train of thought on this. If you can remove punctuation from the bible and skew the meaning of one sentence, why can’t you remove a word or two? Maybe remove a sentence that you don’t have the ability to explain, or perhaps a paragraph that you think is useless. How about the book of Revelation, because we don’t understand, or it makes us uncomfortable? Heck, if you can do away with a whole book and justify that, why not just get rid of everything that does not convey your message. Why not make it say Kill Thy Neighbor, or, I don’t know, some other misrepresentation of the word. What I am saying is that by anything, and I mean anything in the word of God, you are taking it away from away from Christ, and making it your own. The bible according to completefaith…

We have to freely share the word, but I think we have to be extremely careful that we are sharing the word of God, not our twisted memory of what the word may have said.   

For whatever reason, I jumped to the last chapter of Revelation today and look what I found. This is what prompted me to blog this today. Tell me it’s not the “LIVING” word…


 Revelation 22:18-20 (emphasis mine)

18I warn everyone who hears the words of the prophecy of this book: If anyone adds anything to them, God will add to him the plagues described in this book. 19And if anyone takes words away from this book of prophecy, God will take away from him his share in the tree of life and in the holy city, which are described in this book.

 20He who testifies to these things says, “Yes, I am coming soon.”
      Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.


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Revelations 8:10 and 11 – Bitterness

January 10, 2009 at 6:24 pm (Bible, Blessings, Christ and the Bible, Dreams, escitology, Faith, God, Intercession, Jesus, life lessons)

10The third angel sounded his trumpet, and a great star, blazing like a torch, fell from the sky on a third of the rivers and on the springs of water— 11the name of the star is Wormwood A third of the waters turned bitter, and many people died from the waters that had become bitter

This verse stands out to me every time I read it. The strongest word for me is Wormwood. Funny, in a strange way, that that name means Bitterness. Over the last year I have seen so may folks fall away from a true walk with Christ into something else that it brings tears to my eyes, and in most every case it is due to the fact that they have allowed Bitterness to take hold in their heart.

There is another truth in this verse that I have not seen before. “…And many people died from the waters that had become bitter”. The living word of Christ often flows through his followers via dreams, revelations, prayer, deeper understanding of the word, etc. If we call The Word of Christ the Living Water, wouldn’t it stand to reason that if we take the word and filter it through a false doctrine of some type would become something different, bitter and hurtful? Turning it from living water to bitter water, causing people to die spiritually.

I believe that in the end times we will see real physical bitter water due to wormwood, but that there is also the spiritual aspect I describe above due to bitterness allowed to take root in our heart.

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Into the New Year with Repentance

January 8, 2009 at 6:32 pm (Bible, Blessings, Christ and the Bible, Faith, God, Happyness, Intercession, Jesus, Life, life lessons, Praise, Prayer, Worship)

God’s word is coming forth in so many places saying this is going to be a year of momentum, a year of moving forward, a year of mobilization.

People this is going to be a year that will be written into the history books, and never leave the memories of generations to come.

As I read the word, and study the messages of those around me, I am constantly hearing a theme for the beginning of the year.

In the book of Revelations in the letters, Gods word through John is telling the Churches to repent. The Churches, the ones who are to seek higher ground are still in need of repentance.

I think, because of my Catholic upbringing, that I need to wait to “Confess my sins” and penance is somehow the key to beginning to repent. This is altogether a LIE, and misleading by the enemy. I believe that Confession and Repentance are fully two different things. Confession is from your mouth, and Repentance is from your heart.

Confession is between you and another person. Repentance is between yourself and God, it’s a sorrow deep within your heart, a longing to strip away what ever it is that may become between you and Jesus.
My wife shared this with me, but I am sure she will give all the credit to God.
We do not need to wait for the weekend service, or the next prayer meeting. We don’t have to talk to our church friends or spiritual leaders to start this process. We have every right under the blood of Jesus to repent of our sins. You do not need to continue to live in that way until the next meeting, but can be freed through try longing and willingness to drew closer to Jesus.

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Welcome to South Dakota, Today is Abortion Monday

November 10, 2008 at 2:00 pm (Abortion, Bible, Christ and the Bible, Faith, God, Jesus, Life)

Soon Cold Steal forceps will violate a mothers womb, blindly searching for an arm, a leg, a head or body to pull apart. Another child who will never be able to give voice to the pain of his or her death caused by one trained to save their life. Some how this is justifiable because we have yet to see their face or hear their cry.

The fires of Molech and the The Hunger of Leviathan will rage over South Dakota today

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His Heart Cry’s Out

September 24, 2008 at 6:08 pm (Abortion, Being a kid, Faith, God, Intercession, Jesus, Life, Prayer)

So I have a picture in my mind of Jesus, in a field of tall grass and wild flowers, wearing robes that are a little gray and dingy, every day cloths used for work or play. Not the White Robes of royalty, but the rough heavy garments of a Caregiver.

He, Jesus is in this filed down on one knee, grinning nearly from ear to ear and a hearty belly laugh is coming from somewhere deep inside

He is surrounded by Kids, hundreds and thousands of kids of every color and language known to man, laughing and playing, rolling in the grass and just enjoying the breath of life.

I look into his eyes and see a deep sorrow and I understand…
These are the Kids that were lost before they were able to defend themselves.
These are the kids that were lost to abortion
He sits with each one of these every day knitting them back together body and soul, loving them and laughing with them into eternity while his heart cries out every moment for very reason they are even there.

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God spoke to me through a dime on the sidewalk this morning…

August 14, 2008 at 2:18 pm (Blessings, Faith, God, Jesus, Life)

So this morning I found myself walking out of my home away from home, which I lovingly refer to as fourbucks, and I see this dime laying on the sidewalk. I think to myself there’s a dime laying on the sidewalk, I should pick it up, I mean it’s money right, free money. Then I start thinking of reasons not to pick it up, it’s dirty, it’s only a dime, blah blah blah. So I walked on by this little shiny silver dime thinking my final thought on the subject was that I would leave it to bless someone else. That’s when God stepped in and a very specific thought into my mind. “Who are you to pick and choose which blessings you will receive”? By the time the subsequent mental debate had subsided I found myself getting back out of the car and going in search of the dime. Funny thing is at first I was unable to find it and I had the thought God had lifted this blessing and almost started to feel a little panicked but then found this silly dime again. I imagine God was laughing a little bit saying lesson learned.

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